I've talked about my mental health problems on here before, so if this is not your thing, skip this post.
It's just that something has been bugging me, something where I need the input of others to solve a question.
I mentioned how I had traumatizing experiences in my childhood; I was heavily bullied in my school, and my bullies had knives and other weapons, and they often threatened to kill me, and staged "fake executions" with me as a subject, and back then, I thought they were psycho enough to kill me, and if I, now as an adult, think back towards this, I again think they could've been psycho enough to really kill me. Believe me, they were really messed up in their heads.
These situations engraved themselves on my soul, and I eventually had to drop out of school due to growing mental health problems.
Now, the thing is, I never mentioned any of this to my teachers, or therapists, or any other adults in my life. Because I assumed these are the kind of things that most kids have to go through, and that's just how life at school is, and that it is me who is weird and strange, because I had such a hard time coping with this.
But a few years ago, I mentioned some of these things online, and some people were a bit shocked by it, and it gave my the impression that they thought these experiences are not just normal life at school when growing up. This gave rise to the thought that maybe I *should* have told someone about my problems back then.
But it happened so many years age, maybe I should forget about all of this, but I keep coming back to that question: was it a perfectly normal thing that happened to me, was it my "fault" that I was "too weak" to cope with it properly, or not? What do you think?
